Texting on a normal day can be a real struggle for some. Whether you don’t know what to say, what you have to say is too “weird”, or you just can seem to interpret other’s texts correctly, the whole situation ends up as a hot mess. I’ll admit to all three of these and then some. I couldn’t text correctly to save my life, but that doesn’t stop me from trying. It’s difficult now more than ever when texting is becoming more and more deeply ingrained in the way we socialize with one another. It’s pretty much impossible to avoid, especially in the world of dating.
The ultimate question we are all asking is ‘How do I not make myself look like a complete dumbass while talking to a potential boyfriend/girlfriend?’. Once you’re officially a couple you’re good, you’re in there, but until then it’s like blindly running across an interstate highway while holding a pair of scissors.
Although I can’t give you foolproof advice on how to text a potential significant other I can give you tips that I’ve learned personally though the trial and error process. Does my insight actually hold any weight? Well, that’s for you to decide.
Do Not Text Buddy While You’re Under The Influence – I am not a drug addict, however I did recently ingest an ungodly amount of sugar which resulted in my first sugar high is who knows how long. I forgot sugar highs were even a thing! So, yes, I was all hyped up in the middle of the night and I thought “HEY! I’ve been talking to this guy for the past couple of months! Now would be THE PERFECT TIME TO TALK to him!!” I woke up the next morning with more regret than I’ve felt in years. Homeboy probably thinks I’m a complete moron. It wasn’t me! It was the Fanta!
Do Text Buddy Everyday – This seemed a little bizarre to me at first, but as it turns out if two people are interested in each other then they will WANT to keep up with each other even then they don’t physically see each other. Weird, right? Having someone to talk to everyday? It’s crazy, but it’s a thing. Text everyday, but try not to drown them in texts. The best way to avoid this is by refraining from double texting. Also, pay attention. Are you the one who is always starting the conversations? If you are, buddy might not be as interested as you think. Do you always wait for buddy to text you first? You might be sending the wrong signal.
Start With Keeping It Simple – Give this person some time to learn and get used to your texting, talking, and joking style before you get too comfortable texting them. Don’t assume this person knows how you work. Start of by keeping your conversations simple in order to allow this person to get used to you. This is also a great way to avoid scaring them off right off the bat (you’ll have plenty of time to scare them off in person).
Hold Back On Those Profanities – It’s not uncommon to meet people who speak like sailors, and there’s nothing wrong with that. However, it’s easy to come off as aggressive or rude when you use too many profanities around someone you don’t know or just met. Cool off a little and test the waters after you’ve spoken for a bit. I prefer to go for shock value so I’ll randomly incorporate an f-bomb in a regular conversation and see what happens. If buddy approves they will probably follow suit. If not…whoops!
Keep It Light – Avoid heavy subjects until you’ve gotten more comfortable with your texting buddy. Do I need to include a list or do you get what I’m saying? General rule of thumb: If it could be interpreted as creepy or sad it’s probably best for you to keep it to yourself.
Don’t Assume You Know What They’re Thinking – It’s so easy to get self-conscious when texting someone new but don’t assume you know their opinion of your or whatever you said. Give buddy a chance to respond. Don’t stress! Don’t overreact! Just take a deep breath and remember that buddy made the choice to be in this conversation as well. Who knows? They might be just as worried about your opinion of them!